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February 12th, 2006

The local Design Toscano store is going out of business. I got a 30% off coupon, so of course, I had to go.

Design Toscano is incorrectly named. The real name should be: “Why Did I Buy That?” If you’re a nouveau riche Dungeons and Dragons player, it’s the store for you.

You can get your four foot tall, marble pillar, and a gargoyle to put on it.

Need a sumo wrestler on all fours to hold up your glass topped coffee table?
You’re in luck.

Do you worship Bastet? A Tiki God? Need a celtic cross in the yard? Toscano’s got you covered.

It’s my kind of store, especially at 30% off and right before Valentine’s Day.

I was half way home before I realized that I’d been having a Lucy Richardo moment. My husband had not technically asked for the things I’d gotten him.

No one in the history of the universe has asked for these things. The best I could hope for was that he’d laugh after he stopped shaking his head.

So I had my explanations ready:

Why a cane with a pewter death’s head handle?
Because the dragon cane was too short.

He agreed. It was the correct height.

#2 Son came running into the room and yelled, “Mom got Dad a pimp cane.”

Me: “It’s not a pimp cane.”

#1 Son: “Why’d you get Dad a pimp cane?”

“To make the thing in the trunk look normal. Go get the box, boys.”

They dragged the box into the dining room and we opened it.

My husband wanted to know why I bought a 3 foot long dragon skull with detachable horns.

I don’t know.

Because the stone lions were too expensive.
Because the 4 foot bronze mermaid would clash with the decor.
Because the life size sarcophagus wouldn’t fit in the trunk.

Because it was on sale.